I moved on Feburary 25, 2005 through Feburary 27, 2005. It was long and strange, and things happened, and didn't happen, and moments were crystalized. I found the friends I have were infnitely more than I thought they would be... Moving can be such an upheaval. For me it was what was needed... breaking up my fallow ground. I have also been sick for more than a month. My body hasn't quite been healing like it used to. My professor said it is burnt out. That is so, but it is not coming back as quickly as it used to. It might be an age thing, and then again, it might not. I went to a chairopracter on Monday...she says I am out of balance, inside, and I need to get back in balance. That is the truth...
Enough of my ramblings... look what I found when I was moving....
Outside: the day is gentle easing you along with a slow tug at your sleve and playing through your hair, gently toussling it with wind.
today my heart broke,
not for the first time and I suspect not for the last.
my heart broke,
just plain broke in pieces -
not little shards like before but great huge chunks of falling feelings, longings, dreams
because
today a dream that I hung on to with both sets of fingers finally slipped,
finally fell with a thud, then crack, then it voluntarily
gave up it adhesion to its being...
She lied, I loved her anyway -
She lied, I begged for the truth,
She lied and I gave her one last reason to come clean....
SHE LIED!
And with tears coursing down my heart,
I let go and let it all fall to pieces.
God, How I loved her!
- dahlia holmes @ tampa tech art class 6:15 p.m.
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